20th Jan 2017 I Felt Free

20^th Jan 2017

I Felt Free..

Looking from the windows of the car in the winter cold morning, heading  towards T3 Indira Gandhi International Airport, Delhi. The Yezidis Circle (a little tribal boy weeping and make desperate attempts with all his might to break out of a circle drawn around him by other boys on sand) seems impossible to break, all it needed was to erase just a part of it, and the boy was free.  How could I erase a part of circle? The last words of my dying maternal uncle acted as an eraser - “You are young, do now whatever you want to do. My son, there is no energy left when you are old”. Was it Steve Jobs saying “Remembering that you are going to die is the best way to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart” ?

It seems that something is taking place in my life, I felt the fresh breath in the chilly wind and the fear of the unknown seemed to have little effect on my being. I landed in Yangon, Myanmar, here someone is waiting for me,  from the distance I saw my friend looking at the long line of Immigrants. I have been given the access through diplomatic counter and was driven outside on a wheel chair. I called out my friend, seeing me on wheel chair he started laughing saying “you are naughty lah,” Of course the baggage was missed in connecting flight, but nothing seems to cause anxiety here. In my emotional state I felt triumph of excitement over the anxiety – it was first fruit of my longing. And my heart filled with everlasting joy in that moment – do I call it bliss?

A view of Yangon, Kandawgyi Lake from the 7the floor

 Soon the rubber hit the road and glimpses of a place which was not the part of my present life memory - everything so vibrant, bright, vivid - my eyes continued to take impressions. Having reached the Doctor’s palatial house on 7^th floor where all the glass windows and mirrors provides

a sneak look to Shwedagon Pagoda and Kandawgyi Lake. To my disbelief, this seemed to be the perfect landing, not even in my  imagination. And the most awesome guest room I ever had – queens size bed, LED in front, a fridge loaded with Myanmar beer with attached balcony. Giving a large view of city, Yangon Zoo and three famous golden pagodas in front. Suddenly my heart beat goes faster and faster, it’s more and more audible, so loud that I have never heard this ever before. Is it joy or fear, everything is so mixed up, what did I do to deserve this! which keeps me wondering .

Suddenly a knock on my door, someone asks  me to move towards the drawing room. My friend with quite eyes wants to say something …